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In 2006, while living in New York City, I was part of a dynamic community of Yogis. We practiced every morning for 90 minutes. Our practice consisted of mantra, pranayama, asana (the physical postures), philosophy, meditation and deep relaxation.

Often, we’d meet in the evenings and discuss our practices while sharing a nutritious meal. On weekends, we attended workshops and trainings through which we deepened our knowledge and strength. We didn’t always open up about the most personal challenges we were going through, but we had one thing in common: We were transforming our minds, bodies, health and lives. While meeting consistently, we deeply bonded in this experience.

Community gives us momentum to keep up with our practices. When we’re feeling tired, down or unmotivated, our friends and community inspire us to take the time we need to rest and be alone while also encouraging us to get back up. Without this support, we risk embarking on a downward spiral and sinking into old patterns.

The support we receive from community is especially important today as we’re so easily distracted by our handheld devices and additional electronics offering endless streams of entertainment and other consumables. Big tech has invested billions of dollars in developing these platforms to dominate our attention and influence our thoughts, choices and actions.

Through Yoga, we cultivate discipline, focus and the ability to choose what we pay attention to. Developing these skills alongside mitras and in community enriches the journey and makes it enduring.

Mitra: A friend who protects you from harm

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A cornerstone of the Yogi’s Way is maintaining weekly connections with a group of two to three mitras.

The Sanskrit word mitra translates as “friend.” It’s a combination of the root words mi, which means “destruction,” and tra, meaning “protective force.” Your mitras are friends who protect you from harm—not just the dangers of the world, but the ways that we harm ourselves through our own choices, words, actions and thoughts.

In the Vedas, Mitra is a deity who symbolizes honesty, friendship, contracts and meetings. In Zoroastrianism, Mithra is the protector and keeper of truth, friendship, promises and love. In Tibetan Buddhism, Maitreya is the bodhisattva known to be kind and loving.

Mitras listen to us with compassion. They hold us accountable with love. They help us become aware of the ways in which we limit ourselves. Mitras support us to move through our kleshas and experience higher states of consciousness. So often, our friends can see in us what we can’t.

The American Society of Training and Development found that people who have an accountability partner are 65 percent more likely to reach their goals.

Our mitras become our accountability partners. Without accountability, we often fail to practice consistently, and consistency is necessary for growth. The American Society of Training and Development found that people who have an accountability partner are 65 percent more likely to reach their goals. For those who set up regular check-ins with their partner, the percentage skyrockets to 95 percent. When we have someone to be accountable to and to share our experiences with, we are much more likely to stay motivated and to keep our commitments.

Research from the Journal of Clinical Psychology indicates that about 54 percent of people who attempt to shift their habits fail to sustain the transformation longer than six months. On average, individuals attempt the same personal goal 10 times without success. According to this research, the challenge isn’t knowing what to do but committing to the change. The Yogi’s Way mitra practice was designed to support individuals in making lasting transformations.

There is a humility in journeying together on a spiritual path. We have the privilege of witnessing our mitras’ process and connecting deeper with our own. No matter how much self-work we have partaken of, our human nature is to evolve. There is no end to how much we can heal, expand and deepen.

In her research on the science of happiness, Dr. Sonja Lyubomirsky of the University of California, Riverside, found that those who engaged in acts of kindness towards themselves were happy in the moment, but the happiness didn’t last. Those who engaged in acts of kindness towards others became happier and stayed happier for two to four weeks. Our mitras provide us this opportunity.

With our mitras, we practice vulnerability and courage. Clarity is born from these exchanges. As we journey to the centre of our being, we simultaneously cultivate a connection with the creative forces of the Universe. As doors to our soul open inwardly, doors also open outwardly.

Several years ago, two of my good friends, Emily and Anita, had never met and didn’t even know about each other. They’d separately shared with me that they were struggling in their own ways. I had a strong feeling that I had to create a circumstance where the three of us would build an alliance and help one another. I contacted them separately and explained my thoughts.

We agreed to a group call, and I scheduled a Zoom session, as we were scattered across the U.S. I presented them with an idea to set up a 12-week study group to go through a specific set of Yoga practices together. It was structured with daily practices, journaling and awareness exercises, as well as with weekly calls to discuss thoughts, questions, blocks and breakthroughs. They enthusiastically agreed to try it.

What happened in those 12 weeks for each of us was mind-blowing. In the past, I’d done these same Yoga practices alone. The dramatic difference of practicing with my mitras was one of the most powerful experiences of my life. Our connection, intention and commitment created an otherworldly space where magic unfolded. As the weeks passed, we were sending one another quotes, inspiring one another with the small changes we were making in our daily lives, and shifting our own realities.

Two of us helped the other get out of a long-term abusive relationship. Another helped one of us refine our most treasured gift and actually start sharing it with our community. Another one got her dream job after becoming crystal clear on exactly what she wanted. All of this happened in 12 weeks with three mitras.

That process changed each of our lives and inspired the mitra practice that is the first pillar of the Yogi’s Way. Over the years, I’ve witnessed many lives completely transform through such shared experience. Our inner circle is worth its weight in gold.

Week One practices

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Choose your mitras

Engaging your Yoga journey with the support of mitras helps you overcome the kleshas of loneliness and isolation, which have become epidemics in our modern world and can lead to mental and physical unrest.

To begin the process of choosing your mitras, identify the people in your life who influence you in positive or negative ways. They may be colleagues, friends, family members, authors, artists, contacts on social media, people you know well or people you haven’t personally met. Some of them may not be alive, and that’s OK—you may include them too.

In your notebook, make a two-circle Venn diagram like the one shown in the figure below. In the first circle, list the people who discourage or distract you from taking time for yourself. Consider for each one: Is this a toxic relationship? Do you enable them to distract you? Are you subconsciously blocking yourself by having this person in your life?

For the second circle, think of the people who are your champions, who encourage and love you for who you are. Write down those names here.

As you fill in both circles, you may realize that life is often not that black-and-white. In the overlapping section, write down the names of those who play both roles.

The figure below shows the overlap possible between these groups.

Look at your list of champions and pick one or two people who are alive now, whom you have contact with, and who you feel are solid and reliable friends—not part of a co-dependent relationship but part of one that is rooted in mutual care.

In the next 24 hours, reach out to these friends. Explain to them what a mitra signifies. Tell them that you’re embarking on a 12-week journey to transform your mind, health and reality so that you can experience your full potential. Ask them to join you.

The commitment is a one-hour weekly meeting with your mitras on the phone, online or in person. Approximately one hour of daily practice is also included in your commitments.

If you can’t find a mitra, dig deeper. Perhaps your mitra is a colleague you haven’t spoken to in years, a childhood friend you could reconnect with, or a person in your community, family, work or friend circle whom you aren’t close with but have always felt a kinship towards.

You can also reach out to the Yogi’s Way online community, where you may find like-minded people looking to connect with mitras. In addition, the Yogi’s Way offers live 12-week programs (online or in person) where you are paired with mitras through a real-time collective experience. If you choose this option, still move forward with this book. Going through it on your own is a great way to prepare for a live experience.

To connect with the Yogi’s Way community and see upcoming online and in-person events, visit TheYogisWay.com/thebook.

Find your motivation

Yoga helps us minimize kleshas and experience the highest reality.
YOGA SUTRAS (2.2)

We conquer every struggle within the mind
to be united with the love in all.
TAITTIRIYA UPANISHAD (3.10.3–4)

At the heart of The Yogi’s Way is the process of working through our kleshas so we can experience higher states of consciousness, enabling us to live up to our greatest potential. But healing isn’t a linear journey.

In this course, some days you’ll feel like you’re making profound breakthroughs, and some days you’ll feel like you’re walking through mud. That’s why it’s important to establish a clear motivation as to why you want to embark on this path. Your motivation and your mitras will help you stick with your practices.

To practice Yoga for self-gratification doesn’t get us far on the path. When our motivation is to awaken blocked energy so we can give to the world (instead of get from the world), we come into a powerful alignment that supports our practice. One of India’s great Yogis, Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj, said: “Desire the good of all and the universe will work with you.”

Why do you want to overcome kleshas and unite with the light and potential that live within? In your own words, write down your motivation in a couple of sentences. Once you write down your motivation, place it where you’ll see it every day—a sticky note on your bathroom mirror, at the very front of your journal or laptop, or by your bedside table. Read it every day as you move through this course and let it inspire you.

When we begin to live for a higher purpose than ourselves,
an intense fire is ignited deep in our consciousness,
inflaming our enthusiasm and determination.
EKNATH EASWARAN

images: Depositphotos